Friday, January 6, 2012

Friday Flip Off

OK...So I had a whole Friday Flip Off post already written and ready to run.  All I had to do it in the morning was push the little "POST" button with one eye open and a cup of joe in hand. 

But all the Flipp Off's I had seems so insignificant now, so I'm calling bullshit and starting over....

Let me preface this I'm not a huge drinker by any means.  I'm more of a "when-I-drink-I-drink-to-get-drunk" kind of girl as opposed to "have-a-glass-of-wine-every-night" girl.  When the timing is right, I can hang with the best of them.  But the timing is usually only right about twice a month or so.  I'd love to sit and have a glass of wine every night after the kids go to bed, but truth be told...I hate wine.  I want to like it, I try to like it, but I can't.  I just can't like wine.

Anyway...This is my view at this exact moment in time...

And to be honest, this is the way my night has started on Tuesday and on Wednesday too.  No, it's not wine, it's better than wine.  It's a mudslide.  Mmm mmm mmm...

It's just been one of those weeks.  You know the ones...where everything goes wrong, and everything is hectic.

So this Friday Flip Off is a one banger...

I say Flip Off to my whole flippin' week!!

But I'd have to say last night needed the most flipping off.  We dropped the kids off to their piece of crap other parent's house and head out for dinner.  On the way I want to stop at a furniture store to look for some new dressers for the boys' room.  Mr. Goose Poop is driving, and I can't exactly remember where on this road it is, so I google it.  It's about 3 miles down and they are open for another 2 hours.  We get they aren't open for another 2 hours, in fact they are already closed.  Something about closed yesterday for some sales meeting or something. 

Anyway, so we head out for dinner (where we made pigs of ourselves had fried pickles with our dinner), and head over to pick Jake and Carter up from their mom's house.  After getting them, we go get gas.  Now here's where it goes downhill. 

Mr. Goose Poop goes to pull out of the gas station, but doesn't make a COMPLETE stop before pulling out.  Does more of the rolling stop, but was still more than safe.  I, jokingly say, "That was a stop sign, sir" he says something along the lines of "yea, yea" and we laugh it off.  It wasn't as if he blew threw a stop sign, pulling out into traffic at an alarming rate.  He was going slow, it was a road where you could see way down the road before making it to the stop sign, so he pulled out before coming to a COMPLETE stop. 

Ok, so we're driving, we're minding our own business, when all the sudden, about 2 miles from where we pulled out of the gas station, Mr. Goose Poop starts to swerve.  I yell something along the lines of "What the hell are you doing? You're driving like an idiot!"  He said said the cop that was next to us was swerving into our lane really bad, so he had to swerve too or he would have side swiped us.  We look over, and the cop is giving us the stink eye.  We're like what-ev and Mr. Goose Poop continues to drive.

Well the cop kept swerving into our lane, which is making Mr. Goose Poop also have to swerve.  We get to a red light, we are in the right lane, and the cop is in the left lane, one car ahead of us and the light turns green.  We does the cop.

The cars in front of us think it's Sunday, and are going slow.  So Mr. Goose Poop puts on his blinker to get into the other lane, which now puts up right behind the cop.  As soon as we do that, the cop starts going slower, and slower and s-l-o-w-e-r.  Now he's going 35 mph in a 55 zone.  Mr. Goose Poop is like what the hell is this guy doing?!?  I wouldn't say we were tailgating the cop, but we were a little closer than usual.  But come one, you're going 35 in a 55 IN THE FAST LANE at that! 

Next thing you know, the cop slams on his brakes, causing us to have to slam on our brakes, causing the guy behind us to slam on the brakes.  And I mean, this cop really hit the brakes hard.  Mr. Goose Poop gets mad, and gives a little *honk**honk* of the horn.  I'm over there punching him in the arm asking him what the hell he is doing.  He says it's not illegal to honk your horn at someone, especially when they are going 20 under the speed limit and slamming on their brakes.  I'm going, damn just knock it off, and lets get one with our night, would ya. 

Well, of course, as soon as Mr. Goose Poop honks, the cop nearly came to a complete stop in the middle of the road, gets into the right lane, as soon as we pass him he gets behind us with the lights.

Mind you, we are now a good 3 miles from the gas station we pulled out of.  So the cop asks for licence, reg, and proof of insu.  Mr. Goose Poop asks why he is getting pulled over. The cop said because we ran a stop sign pulling out of the gas station.  Now I'm shaking in my boots thinking Mr. Goose Poop is going to loose it on this frickin' cop and end up in jail for the night.  I'm digging through paperwork looking for our updated proof of insu, meanwhile Mr. Goose Poop goes on to tell the cop that he was swerving into our lane, and that you can't go 35 miles an hour on a 55 mile an hour road, and slamming on the brakes is going to cause an accident, and yadda yadda yadda.  Cop says he slammed on the brakes because he was looking at a truck next to us with expired tags.  Mr. Goose Poop argues that there was no truck there, and that he was lying.  And if there was a truck, why wasn't he getting pulled over for an illegal vehicle, instead of us who didn't come to a complete stop 3 miles back.

I'm mentally smacking him up upside the head, and coming up empty handed with the updated insurance.

Long story short...we get a ticket for "running" the stop sign, and one for no updated proof of insurance. 

Mr.  Goose Poop is steaming mad at this guy, and I'm going oh lord! 

We have a couple of cop friends, a few city cops and a state sheriff.  So Mr. Goose Poop talks to one of them this morning, telling her the story, and that he's going to fight the ticket, and what not.  She told him to fight it, but to also file a complaint against this cop.

So Mr. Goose Poop goes to the traffic court this morning, the ticket hasn't been turned in yet, but fills out the paper work to fight it.  Good to go.  Now he wants to file a complaint against the cop.  Well, you gotta go to the police station to do that.

So Mr. Goose Poop drives to the police station, parks and goes in.  On the way in he sees a cop that is a friend of his parent's, so he stops to chat.  Then goes to file a complaint.  Talks with the Sargent, they pull the video from the cop's car last night and go over it.  Blah Blah Blah...

Here's where it gets even better and where I go to fill up my mudslide glass for the 3rd time.

He gets done with the Sargent, and goes outside...TO FIND A $25 PARKING TICKET ON OUR CAR!!!  I thought he was going to loose his marbles right there in front of the cop shop!!! 

I mean, what are the chances?!?  Getting pulled over like we did last night, getting a stupid ticket, not being able to find our current insurance and getting a $25 ticket for that.  THEN when you go to fight the ticket and tell the Sargent one of his cops was being an asshole, you get a frickin' parking ticket right outside the damn police station!!  C'mon....

So I say Flip Off to this whole flippin' week!!


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