Lets pretend...

Lets just pretend this is what my legs looked like this morning when I woke up. Sturdy, held their shape just fine, could stand straight.....

Then this is what they look like now...

They can barely hold me up any more!

You see, long ago, I made a ridiculous deal with Mr. Goose Poop. So long ago, I can't even remember what it was. All I know is if he did something for me, I would do P90X with him when he got laid off. What he did for me was probably something lame like doing the dishes, or putting the kids to bed for a week, or some other thing that can't even compare to the grueling requirements of P90X. Oh, I'm sure it sounded like a good idea at the time. I wouldn't have to do the dishes that night, or put kids to bed for a week, or what ever other silly thing I had come up with. And in turn I'd just have to do a little exercise everyday for 3 months. I'd wanted to start exercising anyway, so at the time it sounded like I was winning.

Well....well...this P90X is no frickin' joke I tell ya! It's an hour of "I'd-rather-die-right-now-than-do-this-stupid-shit" exercise! There were more than a few times that I seriously thought about giving up the ghost, and taking a run for it. Anywhere but in the middle of my living room where those skinny-as-a-rail bimbos were shaking their shit on my big screen tv. I should re-phrase that...where those skinny-as-a-rail bimbos were shaking what they had to shake had they had any thing to shake at all!!

But, I stuck it out, and now my legs feel like jello, barely able to hold my poor torso up any longer!

But damn it...in 89 days I'll be a knock-out, right?!?

Insert some heart warming title here

So I haven't been keeping you very up-to-date about what's been going on around here!

Here's a quick, or not so quick, recap of the last few weeks.

All us girls got together at Florentine's for lunch right after the new year. Any time I get to see my bestie, is a good day for me!

(Why do I look so prim & proper?!?)

At the beginning of January we had our girl's Christmas Party. Yea, the gifts are good, but even better than the gifts are all 8 of us girls together. Eating, catching up, drinking, and playing games. The hit of the night was a game called "Sexy Slang." You draw a card stating a sexy slang, then have to act it out for your team to guess. We just about died! Here's Jaynie trying to act out something to our team!

Here's Catie acting out "dry humping" on Kristi!

Tracy got Jessica a super cute scarf, and this is what Jessica did with it! She looks authentic, doesn't she??

Some of us! This is the best circle of girls I could have ever asked for!

After that weekend, we were off to Mr. Goose Poop's dad's to celebrate Christmas at his house. Here's Jonah helping Grandpa Don prepare the stuffing for the turkey.

Ha...he turned around to see if anyone was watching....Boy, Mom's always watching...and usually with a camera too!

Pfffttt...Here's Jonah trying to opening Aunt Morgan's bottle of Kahlua! Sad part is...Aunt Morgan tried, couldn't get it, Jonah tried, and did get it!! Take that CPS!! There were 10 grandkids at Grandpa's house for two night! We had them packing in like sardines!!

We've played out in the snow time and time again...see post below!! This is why I am in constant need of snow gloves for the kids...

Mr. Goose Poop built a snow ramp for the kids in the back yard! The big kids love snowboarding down, and Ty loves sledding down!

(Please don't mind the awful looking shed in the background! It is now a temporary fix until spring when the snow is gone and we can get a real shed back there!)

That's what we've been up to the last few weeks. And now it's Saturday. Ahhh...Saturday how I love you! Jonah's basketball tournament is this weekend. He played once last night, once this morning already, and we're on our way out the door to the last one in about an hour. Mr. Goose Poop's dad just arrived from Ithaca. He's here to take pictures of Jonah's game, and then he's taking McKenzie and my niece dress shopping for the Daddy-Daughter Dance in a couple weeks. After that, my two sister's and their families are coming over for the night. We are sending the men folk out to the bar, sending the kids downstairs, and we are catching up. Well, more like Angie and I will be attempting to get my sister Morgan loaded!!! Cuz, ya know, she's a lightweight and hilarious when she's drunk! There's meatballs in the crock pot, cheese and crackers on the table, and a double batch of brownies in the oven. Oh, how I love Saturday's!!

One more thing Dear Mother Nature....As much as I love this outfit...

And these boots...

I'm ready for my tank-tops and flip-flops! So if you could let up on the snow storms this bloggy mom would really appreciate it! Thankyouverymuch!

I'm annoyed...

...it's January, right people?!?

I've got 7 kids. Seven kids who love to play outside. And play outside they do. And in turn, they go thru snow gloves like crazy. And I don't buy the cheap-y kind either. By no means do I buy the world's best ski performance gloves either, but I spend about $10 per pair on gloves. I'll call them "fairly" good snow gloves. Well, it's the middle of winter, and they are all about due for new gloves again to get them thru the rest of winter.

So I go shopping. For gloves. Pfffttt...riiiiiight!! Why is it so friggin' hard to find snow gloves in JANUARY?!? Let me re-phrase that....WHY CAN'T I FIND ANY GLOVES IN JANUARY?!?? Let me remind you....it's January folks...in Michigan! Who in the world doesn't have snow gloves in stock right now?!?

Know how many stores I went to looking for them? Let us count...I went to...Meijer, Target, Walmart, Kohl's, K-Mart, Burlington Coat Factory, Big Lots, and even MC Sporting Goods. I found one pair at K-mart! I couldn't even find any at the stinkin' sporting goods store. You know, the one that sells SKIING EQUIPMENT?!? No ski gloves though! But want to know what I found TONS of??! Bathing suits! That's right, bathing suits! Who buys a bathing suit in January?! Oh yea, those people that take vacations in January, that's right. Well people-that-take-vacations-in-January....you should think about that before January. Or wear last years model. So the stores stop putting bathing suits out in January! You're the minority here, not me, the mom who needs gloves for her kids in the middle of winter! What are people buying more of? Bathing suits or snow gloves? I'm going to go out on a limb here and just throw the guess out there of snow gloves! I can find those stupid little knit gloves all over the damn place. But, c'mon, who wears those ridiculous things? Especially out in the snow? That's right...no one. No one at all!!

I'm so frustrated right now! I can't believe I can't find gloves for my kids in the middle of winter. I guess if they were polar bears, I'd be all set. Then they'd actually need the bathing suits to, you know, swim in the freezing cold! But they're not, so the bathing suits do me no good what so ever. None. Nodda. Zip. Zero. Zilch.

I know you're going to ask me why I don't either buy the kids nice quality gloves at the beginning of the year, or why I don't just buy them all 2 pairs to start the winter. I've got perfectly good answers for both of those questions. I did buy a super nice quality pair of gloves for one of my kids one year. I got them on a major clearance event one time. And I still paid too much for them. It was a $60 pair of gloves for $17. I bought them, and know what...come January they were already ripped. Yes, they were ski gloves, but they certainly didn't hold up to what my kid put them thru. And I was back at square one. So, no more expensive nice quality gloves anymore. And as far as buying them 2 pairs of gloves at the beginning of the year...I already have to buy them new boots, new snow pants (snow pants don't usually make it long enough to pass down), hats, and gloves. Sometimes even new winter coats. If I bought them all an extra pair of $10 gloves, that's an extra $70! I don't usually have $70 burning a hole in my pocket. Especially when we've already spent an average of $50 per kid on winter attire.

That's my excuse and I'm sticking too it!!

But maybe I need to cut the excuses, and just buy them an extra pair. But I won't like it that's for sure. Better yet....HELLO RETAIL STORES....I've got an idea...HOW ABOUT YOU STOCK WINTER GLOVES IN WINTER. Sounds simple, huh?! And you lucky bums that get to go on vacation in January...buy your suits in July or wear last year's so people stop buying those dumb bathing suits in January!

Off my soap box now, and back to my regularly scheduled life!!

Writers block?!?

I think I'm having writers block. Or something. I don't know what it is. Life block? I haven't a clue! My last post was January 12. Terrible. I'm supposed to be a bloggy mommy. Going nearly 10 days without a post shouldn't happen. I guess I could forgive myself if there was actually a reason for going so long in between posts. Say, we were on vacation (pffft...I wish), or we were super de-dooper busy. But, lets face it...we weren't on vacation, and we weren't super de-dooper busy. Well, by my standards we weren't super de-dooper busy, by other people's standards we probably were.

But that's not the point. I've been lazy. Lazy on the blog, and lazy in life. Know what I did yesterday?! Mr. Goose Poop went to work, but it was so cold they sent him home. So I sat on the couch from 9:00 in the morning until 11:00 at night...reading. Yup...I sat and read for 14 hours straight. Yes straight! I read 1 whole book and 3/4 of another. Then finished the other 1/4 this afternoon! How lame! I have no drive to switch the laundry that's been in the washer for a whole day now. I have no drive to wash the dishes that have been in the sink since last night. I have no drive to even get my ass off the couch take a shower. Pathetic!

Pathetic I tell you. Is it the weather? This stinging, freeze your nose hairs cold? Or am I just run down this week? A funk? I don't know what it is, but quite frankly I don't like it one bit! I need to snap out of it. I feel like I'm walking around in a fog the past few days. My eyes burn (could it be all the reading?), my stomach's been upset (not enough "good" food?), I'm always freezing (freeze your nose hairs cold?), and all I want to do is crawl into bed and not wake up for, oh say, a year at least!!

So while I'm nursing myself back to my normal, bloggy-self, at least you know why I haven't stopped in lately.

'Til next time dear readers....I'll be finding my old self. Hopefully she got lost in the laundry room or the bottom of the sink. God knows I'm in there enough, at least I'll find myself fast!

A few of my favorite things...

~Coffee! Mmm...coffee. I couldn't make it thru most of my mornings without it!

~When someone sneezes, and one of my kids say "Bless you!" How sweet!

~Snow! Call me crazy, but I love snow! It's so peerrdy!!

~Mr. Goose Poop! Of course I love him, I mean, he's my hubby, right? But not only do I love him, he's one of my favorites!

~My best friend! God blessed me with a wonderful best friend to call my own. We've been friends for 17 1/2 years now. Not just "friends" but talk-on-the-phone-every-day-knows-every-tiny-thing-about-you-couldn't-live-without-you friends. We're those crazy friends that hug and kiss every time we see each other. Even when it's 7 days in a row. We're the ones that annoy people with how close we are. I love her to death!

~JuJubes! If you know me, you know I ALWAYS have a box of JuJubes in my hand. I'm missing them like crazy right now. You see, I've got to slim the mid section a little, and JuJubes weren't helping. I didn't give them up, but Mr. Box-of-JuJubes and I are taking a break for awhile.

~Books! I love books. If I could do one thing for the rest of my life, I'd read! I'll read any book that is put in front of me. If it's got words, I want to read it.

~My kids! Sure, they drive me bonkers sometime. Ok, most of the time! But they are the best kids I could ever ask for. Sometimes I lay in bed at night recapping the days events in my head, and I just cry. Cry for no reason other than I love those little shits more than anything in the world.

~My sunglasses. Don't leave the house without them. And if I do, I go back and get them.

~Flip-flops! I wear flip-flops until the snow is above my ankles.

~Slippers! Love 'em! I wear them all. the. time.

~The staff and parents at Immanuel-St. James Lutheran School! I love my kids' school. I love the teachers there. I love the staff there. I love the parents there. We are so blessed to have such a wonderful school. And secretly, it's one of the reason's I'm not pushing Mr. Goose Poop to get us out of this too-cramped house of ours. When we move, we're moving to a place with lots of space. Home space, and yard space. And I'm worried when we find the perfect spot, it won't be in driving distance to ISJ. I'd be heartbroken!

~Diet Coke! Duh...How this didn't make it in the top 4 I have no idea. I'm an addict! Diet Coke addict. No joke, it's past the point of insane!

~Comfy clothes! If I never put on a pair of jeans again, I wouldn't be sad. I'd live my life in a pair of jammie pants, a T-shirt, and a sweatshirt if I could. Oh yea...that's right, I already do!

~My parents! Most people love their parents, I know this. But my parents are my world. I don't know what I'd do without them. I'm one of those crazy girls that calls her mom usually once a day. Sometimes even more. I love love love them!

~Freshly mopped kitchen floors. 'Nuff said!

~A summer drive. Where you have nowhere to go, you're just going. Windows down, radio up!

~My "in-laws"! I say that in quotations because I hate calling them my inlaws. I don't think of them as my "other" family. I think of them just as I do my own "real" family. I was so blessed in this department. I don't have some crazy overbearing mother in law, who thinks I'm not good enough for her sweet precious son. She rocks, love her. (Remember, she's the one who made us those kick ass Goose Poop sweatshirts for Christmas! Oh yea, I haven't posted picts yet!) I got two father-in-laws out of the deal too. Besides my dad, they are my favorite! So laid back, go with the flow, not creepy like some. And then there's my sister-in-laws. I don't call them that...they are totally my sisters. Two of them. I am so blessed in the in-law department.

Of course there are more. There always is. But the dryer just buzzed, meaning I'm back on my feet. Guess I shouldn't have been off them either. The breakfast dishes are giving me the evil-kanevil eye from the sink. Those are some of my favorite things. That without them, my life wouldn't be complete. Yes, my life just wouldn't be complete without JuJubes and Diet Coke!

I added another badge to my mother vest....

Cuz let's face it, we all count how many badges we collect on our mom vest! I must be somewhere around 2,143,085 by now...but really who's counting!

OK, I am. I totally am. I wear the vest with honors. We all do. And we all should. Being a mom's tough work. Doesn't matter if your a mom to 1 or a mom to 10, it's all hard work.

So today I added another badge. This was the "Send a Child into Surgery" Badge. Whoa, it was a tough one to earn, too!

You see, last week Christian went in for his well child visit. You know, where the docs tell you you don't feed your kids the right foods, that they need to read more and watch less tv, that you're failing miserably at this parenting thing, and need to try better. OK, not really. It just seems like it I guess. Anyway, we went in for that, and the doc gives the whole "I need to check your private area. It's ok for me to do that since mom's here. But we never let anyone touch us in the privates, and if someone does, we have to tell mom or dad right away." Ok ok doc, I've told him this before, lets get on with the show here. He's got 30 minutes until he misses class snack. So she pulls down the unders and cops a feel. For a long time. Longer than usual. And she's playing with the poor kid's "boys". Ok, probly not playing per say, but she's down there way longer that I was comfortable with.

Come to find out, he had fluid on his testicles. When he was an infant, and his testies fell into the sack, they brought some fluid along for the ride. And apparently it's a common thing that will remedy itself by about 18 months of age, but the "highway" Christian's testies took a travel down never closed up properly. So as a result fluid was leaking from his insides into his sac. And I was told if this isn't taken care of asap, his "boys" will never work correctly. Yea, never. No grand-babies from Christian. Not an option in my book.

So we were scheduled a surgical appointment 3 days later, and surgery 4 days later.

The cool thing about all this is, Grand Rapids just got a new Children's Hospital. It's been in the works for 5 years now, and we've all been eyeing the building of it. It was scheduled to open 1/11/11...just the day of Christian's surgery!! He was one of the first 3 kids to enter into the hospital for surgery this morning. Pretty cool!

Here's a little about our day...

Here's Christian right after check-in and right before being taken back into our room. He was so excited, not nervous one iota, and couldn't wait to have surgery. Weird kid....

Here he is after just putting on his hospital gown. He wasn't so thrilled about that, but did it like a champ!

After all the initial vitals were taken, we had about 30 minutes to kill. They brought him into a play room to relax a bit.

Computer time in the play room!

While in the toy room, a nurse came in to show Christian how he will be put to sleep. Gave him his mask and some chapstick!

He loved the mask!

After a half an hour of play time, the nurse brought us back to our room and told us the doc had ordered some meds before surgery. I know she explained them, and I know I wasn't paying attention because I had to pee something fierce!! So after her spiel, I went to the bathroom while she gave Christian his meds. I mean, it was attached to the room, and I could here everything she was saying. Didn't think anything of it. Got out of the bathroom and the nurse tells me she has to put the sides of the bed up, that she didn't want him falling out. I thought that was weird. I mean, he's 5...probably not gunna fall out of bed. What ev...she put the sides up, turned the tv on, and left. We watched a little tv, relaxed a bit...then all the sudden it happened. Right in the blink of an eye. One minute Christian was a normal kid in a bed, the next minute he was acting like a drunkin' fool!! Slurring his words, couldn't keep his eyes open, bobbing up and down with his head. I started to get scared, and almost called the nurse. What the hell had they given my kid?!? Then the anesthesiologist came in to introduce himself. I asked why Christian was acting so bazaar. He said I signed a consent form allowing these meds. Duh!! Really should have paid better attention I guess! It was just some loopy meds to have him relax a little before being put under. The doc said if you could imagine a 5 year old all "schnockered" (yes he used that word!), this is what it's be like. Well, he was relaxed all right. He was giggling at everything!! Friggin' hilarious!

Anyway, here he is right after the loopy meds...

And here he is about 20 minutes after the loopy meds! I wish I had a video camera. I haven't laughed that hard in a long long time!

They wheeled my sweet boy off down the hall, and away he went. I got to sit only a few doors down from the OR, but I still didn't like one minute of it. The surgery only took around 45 minutes. Doc came out, told me all went well, and I'd be able to go see his as soon as he opens his eyes. (I guess they don't let you before that just in case they don't come out of it well!)

Within 3 minutes of him waking up, I was back there with him. He still didn't really know what was going on, but he did awesome!

Christian wanted this picture taken. He wanted to show his brother's his "drinking straw" as the nurses called it. Show how brave he was!

Here he is back in his room. Mr. Goose Poop didn't come to the hospital with us, so Christian had to call him as soon as we got back to his room. Notice he still doesn't really know what going on!

They monitored him for a few hours. Made sure he came to his senses like he was supposed to, and we were released. He was looking forward to the wheelchair ride more than anything. He asked escort services if he could take the wheelchair home!! Haa haa...

Mom and Christian

And here he is now. Just as he's been since we got home this afternoon, and just like he'll be for the next 24 hours. Laid up on the couch.

He did great. And so did his mom if I don't say so myself!! I added another badge to my vest today. And I wear it with honors!

I'll get grand-babies from Christian after all. Well, I shouldn't jinx myself like that! At least he'll be able to make the decision as to give me grand-babies now!!

If you don't like cooking....

....I suggest you don't have 7 kids!

If you don't like laundry....
....I suggest you don't have 7 kids!

If you don't like countless doctor's appointments...
...I suggest you don't have 7 kids!

If you don't like scheduling your life around sports practice/games....
...I suggest you don't have 7 kids!

If you don't like working as a judge...
...I suggest you don't have kids!

If you don't like being involved in school functions....
...I suggest you don't have 7 kids!

If you don't like occasionally going out of you comfort zone....
...I suggest you don't have 7 kids!

If you don't like doing dishes 4 times a day...
...I suggest you don't have 7 kids!

If you don't like skipping breakfast, lunch, or dinner....
...I suggest you don't have 7 kids!

If you don't like wiping asses all day long...
...I suggest you don't have 7 kids!

If you don't like being puked on...
...I suggest you don't have 7 kids!


But...what's more than that...if you don't like having CPS called on you, and being subpoena-ed into court for being owed a shit ton of money....
...I suggest you don't ever marry a douche-bag!!


You see, this past 2 weeks have been hard. No, wait, they've been more than hard. Beyond hard.

In the past 2 weeks, we've been to 4 doctor's appointments between the kids, had one puking, basketball practice and games up the wazooker, found out one child is having surgery next Tuesday, and to top if off, one of the dumb-ass ex's has filed ANOTHER false Child Protective Service case on us, and the other dumb-ass ex has gotten them self so far behind in child support that they got arrested on felony charges, which means I've now been subpoena-ed into court, now making said ex fully believe we have something to do with it.

I've gotten advise from many-a-people to be careful what I put on this site. You never know who's reading. I fully and totally am aware of that. And I am. Careful that is. But really, what's the chances "they" find this spot? And what's more, who cares? What I write can't get me in trouble BECAUSE I have nothing to hide!

Yea, I'm pissed. Seriously ex...ANOTHER CPS case?!? What? The last 3 in-home inspections you've made them do on us wasn't enough for you?!? If we're really beating your child, why do you send him back to us? Why not keep him and call the cops?!? Stop all the this CPS shit. You have no idea what it's doing to all the kids in the home when these people show up. No one in this house is being beaten. Everyone knows that...including you. You think you're helping your case, when in fact, you're hurting yourself. There comes a point when calling CPS is considered harassment! Just sayin'...

And hey, you other ex...just because you got yourself behind in child support, doesn't mean it's my fault. I'm not the one that ordered you to pay. It was the judge. Take it up with him. You'd think being $23,000 behind would raise some red flags for you. But instead you'd like to shuffle the blame to someone else. That someone else being me. I'm not the one who didn't pay. You are. I'm not the one who hauled your ass into court this morning. The state is. Just because I was subpoena-ed to show up, and they hauled my ass out in the hallway to talk, doesn't mean I was the one to bring charges against you. All she was doing was telling me what would happen in front of the judge in case I was called up to speak. PAY YOUR DAMN CHILD SUPPORT AND YOU WOULDN'T BE IN THIS SITUATION!!!

I can handle the laundry, dishes, and endless hours of cooking. I can even handle the sporting events, puking kids, and thousand's of doctor's appointments. I'm ok with clipping coupons to save us money, going without the latest trends so my kids can have them, and living on only a few hours sleep because there are lunches to be made, snow stuff to dry for the morning, and class snacks to bake.

But I'm not ok with being accused of child abuse and blamed for your failure to pay child support. Get your own lives together. Why don't you guys stop worrying about what we're doing over here and worry about what you've got going on over there. I know our life seems so glorious, full of rainbows and roses...but it's just a regular life guys. No need to stick your noses in it. You know what they say....bees love roses, so you go sticking your noses in our roses and you're bound to get stung one way or another!!!

Ringing in the New Year

It's been a couple of blah days around here. We've had record highs for December, but it's been raining. Blah. So all the snow is gone, my yard is a big mud pit, and there are 7 random sleds hanging out in my driveway!! We had grandiose plans to bring the kids ice skating on Thursday, but the weather had other plans for us. And they weren't better than the original...

...So we've spent the past few days cooped up. The kids haven't gotten out of their pj's in 3 days! Yes, I just admitted that! Totally haven't been out of jammies in 3 days! They've been cooped up, going crazy, and in turn driving Mr. Goose Poop and I bonkers!!!

Here's how we spent New Year's Eve around here....

Playing a little UNO!!

Next it's the Wii!!!

Carter

Christian

Dylan

We ate dinner at 8:30, and had the kids watch a movie from 9:30-11:00!! It's hard to keep kids occupied that late!!

McKenzie was almost stuck ringing in the new year having a sliver dug out of her foot!! The thing was ginormous!!!

Mr. Goose Poop and I decided to be adults and actually had some wine last night!! That never ever happens...

OK...maybe a little Champagne too!!!

The kids even got "kid wine"...It was yucky!!!!

Kenz and Mom

Mr. & Mrs. Goose Poop

All together now!

Finally at 12:16 we sent the kids to bed...Such a L.O.N.G. night!!

I was going to reflect on 2010 tonight. But I just plain don't have the energy for all that! Maybe tomorrow if I have time. Pffft...time....who'm I kidding?!? Like I get extra time!!

Happy 2011!!!